


lacuna

by cryystal_m00n



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Boys In Love, Dry Humping, Fluff, Getting Together, Knight Lee Jeno, Light Angst, Light Dom/sub, Love Poems, M/M, Oblivious Lee Jeno, Pet Names, Prince Na Jaemin, Red String of Fate, Smut, but like................ it takes a While bc theyre both IDIOTS, courting, renhyuck are the only smart boys here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-10-06 15:40:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20509403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cryystal_m00n/pseuds/cryystal_m00n
Summary: they are tied together by the universe's will, meant to be, to fall in love. but sometimes, the universe works in such a funny way, that they are also meant to fall apart.





	lacuna

**Author's Note:**

> this is a gift for one of my best friends, ju. i really hope you like it baby!!! happy birthday!!! <33333  
huge thanks to my beta, lala, for helping me through this!  
the only trigger warning i have is massive idiots ahead, please proceed with caution. with that being said, enjoy my dudes, dudettes and non-binary friends

the red string of fate is something almost everyone has. the universe doesn’t care if someone isn’t fond of the idea of soulmates. if the universe offers offers something, one cannot turn it down. it’s the same thing that happens in a person’s life. they don’t have a say in this matter. it’s all up to the infinite and vast universe. 

there are some people, far and in between, who are _ gifted _. they can see their own string. it’s something that occurs once in ten generations, and even then, it’s rare. it’s not something the person should be proud of, however. 

if they can see who their soulmate is, they _ are _ a freak of nature. they can choose to distance from their soulmate, to ruin relationships and lie, in order to get the best possible outcome.

jeno isn’t like that. well, he is a freak of nature, but he doesn’t want to ignore his soulmate and leave him for someone better. because, well… his soulmate is the one who is bound to leave him. 

it’s a long story, probably longer and more complicated than time itself, but jeno still thinks he should explain his sorrow. at least, the way he sees it.   


* * *

when jeno was just a five year-old boy, he began to notice that something always clinged to his pinkie. it was the same red string, over and over again. whenever he pulled at it, either to try and get it off or to see where it would lead, the string would disintegrate, its particles flying about in the wind, only for jeno’s eyes to see. 

the string appeared back every time, a constant reminder that jeno was tied to something or _ someone _. when he posed this curiosity to his mother, she cried. at first, the child thought they were tears of joy, maybe he was special since he had a seemingly infinite piece of thread tied to his finger. he was soon to find out just how wrong his assumptions were. 

his mother urged him to _ never _ speak of the string in public, that it would be their little secret. she told him to not tell his father either, _ it will be better if he doesn’t find out, baby _. 

jeno was still so,_ so _confused about what was happening to him. was this normal? shouldn’t his mother be worried? shouldn’t she at least explain what was happening to him?

he stayed quiet after that, never once bringing up the string clinging to him. the secret stayed buried within him for years, his mother going as far as taking it with her into her grave. 

it was the saddest thing to ever happen in his life. he cried after his mother for weeks, begging anyone who could hear his prayers to bring her back. no one heard him, no god in the whole universe heard the seven year-old beg for his mother. 

jeno found out in the same year his mother died what the string means. it was the red string of fate, the one that guided people to their soulmates. he found out about it when the villagers threw a girl, barely a child, out of lorkas, their peaceful village. they said she was a bad omen to them, that she was _ gifted _. they gave the family an ultimatum. they either killed the girl or everyone moved away, far, far away. 

he watched as the family left, the people of larkos insulting them as if they weren’t their friends a week ago. his father watched from next to him, his grip on jeno’s shoulder tightening. 

“thank goodness you aren’t like that, jeno. i can’t bear the thought of having one of them as my own blood.” he pulled the child back inside their little home. it’s been quiet since his mother died. “now come on, we have to prepare for the visit of the prince. it’s not often we have the royal family step into our village.”

jeno followed his father, once again keeping quiet about his secret. it wasn’t as if he’d meet his soulmate while still a child. most people meet theirs when they’re over eighteen at most. 

he was wrong. extremely wrong. the universe had other plans for him. it was almost as if it was playing a twisted little game with him. 

the young crown prince, jung jaemin, just a few months younger than jeno himself, proved to be his soulmate. jeno felt many things when he noticed the way the string length lessened with each step he took to where the royal family was greeting the people. excitement, anxiety, confusion. 

the jung family were looking as ethereal as ever, truly touched by the gods themselves. king taeyong was happily conversing with some of the elders, while king jaehyun was being jumped on by the children. he still managed to steal glances at his husband, smiling softly when he saw how happy the elder king was. 

jaemin wasn’t really paying attention to anyone, playing with one of the corgis baekhyun owned. jeno observed from afar, too scared of … exposing his nature. what if jaemin was like him? what if he outed him to the people. he would humiliate his father. he was the only person that was still in jeno’s life. 

the prince noticed him, his eyes widening at the sight of him. if it was a good thing or not, jeno wasn’t sure. jaemin signaled for him to come closer, but when the boy made no move of walking towards him, he took it upon himself to he walk over to him, ignoring the way everyone pulled aside to make room for the young prince. 

“i’m jaemin!” he introduced himself proudly, hand in front of jeno. he was waiting for jeno to do _ something _. 

the elder looked at the way the string was at its shortest length. it was more opaque too, no longer a faded red. something lit up inside jeno. something he had never felt before. his young mind could not understand it no matter how much he tried. 

“jeno,” he said, a small smile spreading across his face when jaemin’s much colder hand shook his. 

that was the moment he decided he will follow his soulmate anywhere. jaemin was his future lover, his future best friend and so much more too. he would still keep his secret, but being close to jaemin wouldn’t hurt him.   


* * *

the next morning, before going to school, he told his father he wanted to become part of the royal guards. his father was thrilled. and jeno was sure his mother was happy too, from wherever she watched over him. 

* * *

he trained with more boys and girls than he could count, but the ones that stood out the most to him, and the ones that became his friends, were renjun and donghyuck. donghyuck had a fire in his eyes, something jeno had never seen before. he was willing to fight anyone and anything that came his way. renjun, on the other hand, was more subdued. but even so, his mind ran in such a way that it purely amazed him. it was almost as if at any time, the little wheels inside his brain were working to come up with the biggest, most complex plan. 

they became friends, the kind that would risk it all for the other, in their last year as trainees, jeno finally managed to defeat both of them in combat, as well as skill. 

now, at the age of nineteen, one year in being actual guards, they are still his best friends. they are also the only ones who know of his secret. he may have disappointed his mother by sharing it, but his heart felt at peace, no longer having to hide and lie to his friends. 

it also didn’t help that renjun is far too smart for his own good, quickly coming to the conclusion that the lingering stares jeno was giving the prince must mean he was either in love with him, or he knew that they were soulmates. 

jeno was fast to deny the first part, whilst admitting the second. it was better to have them _ not _ think he’s in love with the crown prince he has to protect. 

most of the time, he’s happy they know. but there are moments, more and more frequent, when he _ regrets _it. the teasing, at first, was something he could take. they barely did it anyway, since the three of them had to work hard in order to be able to work in the palace and not get separated. but now? now jeno is the ultimate target. 

he blames it on johnny, _ everything _is johnny’s fault, because he was the one to assign him as jaemin’s personal guard. johnny and all of the power he holds of the troupes. jeno would fight him, had he not been so scared of the giant man. 

(there are stories, rumours, that johnny slayed a dragon once. jeno doesn’t believe it, the man is too much of a sweetheart to even kill a fly. that is, unless his friends or lover gets hurt. then he’s worse than a dragon that spits fire.)

“how’s your soulmate, no?” renjun asks, joining him at the table where he’s been eating his breakfast. 

“fuck you, injunnie,” he says around a mouthful of bread. he’s not that charming after just waking up, but renjun is used to it. 

the elder sighs, moving his hand to wipe some of the crumbs off his face. “stop talking while you’re eating, you brute,” renjun scolds, already knowing that the words hold no meaning to jeno. 

“make me, coward,” jeno challenges, sending some spit (that is gross, he admits it) flying on renjun’s face. 

“could the two of you _ stop _ acting like a married couple for one second?” donghyuck appears in front of them, apparently out of thin air. it may as well be true, since there seems to be smoke coming from around him. “it makes me sad,” he continues, a pout playing on his lips. 

“did you walk through the kitchen while kun was throwing flour around again?” jeno asks.

“well, you wouldn’t be so sad if you just confessed to johnny’s brother, hyuck,” renjun says at the same time. neither of them denies the two being a couple, because they know donghyuck will just ignore them and continue to say whatever he wants. 

donghyuck ignores renjun’s unwanted input. he answers jeno instead, “no. i just went through his kitchen and yangyang attacked me with flour so we had a war and then kun yelled at us and threatened to burn us with his magic because that’s totally how you should treat the kids, kun!” near the end of his rant, he raises his voice, loud enough for the cook to hear. a fire erupts right next to donghyuck’s hand, making the boy yelp. 

“you can ignore me, but you can’t run from me, hyuck. i’m always here, creeping behind you, watching from the shadows. you can’t run, hyuck. i will _ find you _ .” donghyuck throws a spoon at him. renjun throws a fucking _ knife _ at donghyuck. jeno simply sighs and pretends not to see them. 

it’s better not to question the trio’s dynamics. and honestly? jeno himself doesn’t questions it anymore. renjun and donghyuck would both kill each other given the chance, but the moment a stranger even _ dares _to look at the other in a funny way, they are ready to spill blood. blood that isn’t donghyuck’s or renjun’s. and jeno? jeno is the mediator, most often than not. he is there to make sure that the two don’t actually commit murder. but sometimes, if he’s feeling adventurous and suicidal, he will even fight them back. they love each other, that one is not something they can deny, but the world doesn’t seem to believe it. 

“as i was saying,” donghyuck starts, almost half an hour after his arrival, “the prince asked me to tell jeno he needs him.”

jeno stands up so fast his knees hit the table, sending donghyuck’s bowl of porridge flying. “you didn’t say that! like ever!” he yells, frantically looking around for the rest of his uniform.

“i am sorry,” donghyuck sings, not sounding sorry at all. 

renjun gives jeno an understanding look. “go on, jen. you left the prince waiting already,” he glares at the blond who is humming happily under his breath as he stabs whatever is left of his porridge. “hurry.”

with one silent thank you, jeno rushes out of the guards’ room, struggling to place his sword next to his hip without dropping it. he runs past the gardens, past king taeyong who has to cling to johnny, in hopes that he won’t get run over, past one confused looking mark, who shouts after him to be careful, until he finally, _ finally _reaches jaemin’s room. 

he regains his posture, fixing his uniform and hair, and knocks, loud enough for the prince to hear, but not so harsh to startle him. 

“come in!” a voice calls from inside. jeno pushes the door open, stepping inside the room carefully. jaemin is waiting for him in his bed, sprawled out on the soft bedding and even softer pillows. he takes his time in standing up, enjoying the way jeno’s patience wears thinner and thinner with each second wasted. 

jeno bows, staying like that until jaemin reaches him. the prince puts his hand on the guard’s head, silently telling him to stand properly. “what is it, your highness?”

“i told you to call me nana, jeno,” jaemin whines, “that way we can be nana and nono!” when he sees that jeno doesn’t give up on his stoic appearance, jaemin sighs. “i want to court the person i’ve grown feelings for.” 

jeno feels a thousand knives stabbing his heart, one sharper than the other. he tries to keep his voice steady as he speaks, “and what do you need my help for, your highness?”

“well, you seem to know a lot about romance! and don’t even try to deny it, jeno, i’ve heard the stories of your infamous love poems.” jeno curses donghyuck’s entire existence. “so i want you to help me make sure i know what to tell hi-- them. will you offer me your knowledge, oh mighty jeno, the third of his name, yet the first of his romantic ass?”

he can’t help but smile. “ok,” he agrees, “i’ll help you…” jaemin smiles, expecting something more, “nana.”

the prince whoops in excitement, and that alone is a sign for jeno of already dreading the shit he’s gotten himself into.

* * *

he helps jaemin write poems, helps him pick out flowers, carefully explaining what each of them means. jeno never sees where the bouquets or the poetry disappears, and jaemin is too much of a brat to actually tell him who is the person he’s courting. 

“what if he’s actually courting you but you’re too much of an idiot to realize it?” donghyuck asks, after another one of jeno’s long rants. 

“haha,” he says bitterly, “very funny, hyuck.”

renjun pushes himself off the wall he’s been leaning on. he dusts his already spotless pants and says, almost as if he’s not interested in the topic at hand, “he’s right. and you’re a goddamn idiot for not realizing it.”

“hey!”

“let _ me _ finish,” the elder mutters through gritted teeth. jeno has no idea why he is so touchy today. “from the moment you stepped into this castle to train jung jaemin has been keeping an eye on you. he’s probably even more enamoured with you than you are with him. but _ somehow _ both of you idiots can’t seem to see that you are literally made for each other! can you just _ take _ your head out of your ass and see that he’s in love with you? fuck it, even if he’s not, just confess and get it over with! if he’s actually courting someone else, which he’s _ not _, then this will bring you enough closure to move on! you don’t need to live happily with your soulmate! you can fall in love with someone else! you can be happy with them too! just shoot your shot, jeno! you won’t regret it, trust me.” renjun doesn’t wait for jeno to even process the whole bomb he had just dropped. he simply leaves, a stunned jeno and a chuckling donghyuck staring at his back. 

“what’s gotten his panties in a twist, gee,” donghyuck mumbles, but behind his humored look, jeno can still see worry. 

“didn’t he say kunhang’s been getting on his nerves again?”

“well it’s kunhang, put him and yangyang in a room and there’s gonna be chaos.” donghyuck shrugs, ruffling jeno’s black hair to grab his attention. “can we go back to talking about myself?”

jeno nods, not in the mood to listen donghyuck talk about how mark’s been actually paying attention to him lately. it is an improvement, the fact that mark can keep his eyes out of his plant books for more than five seconds. and what’s even more impressive is that jeno can vaguely hear donghyuck admitting to liking mark(‘s cheeks, but he will just pretend not to have heard that).

even with this, jeno’s head is still filled with two boys, one that makes his heart flutter with a simple smile and one that… makes his heart ache. it’s sad, now that he thinks of it, the two of them fit both descriptions. 

they might as well just both be his soulmates. 

jeno sighs, and tries to focus on his friend again. he fills his head with the fire radiating from donghyuck, and for just a moment, he forgets about everything else.   


* * *

maybe it’s the fact that jeno memorizes each bouquet he helps jaemin make, or maybe it’s actually the fact that he lives a sad, sad life, but he _ swears _ that the flowers on his bed are the _ exact _ same ones he’s picked with the prince not even two days ago. there is nothing nearby that could indicate this is truly from jaemin, no sign. 

it’s just the simple bouquet, pink camellias wrapped in just a little bit of paper. it can’t be from jaemin. the prince said he is courting someone, a person he’s longing for, someone that could have a future with him. why would he choose jeno, a simple royal guard, out of thousands of worthier people?

he pushes the flowers aside gently. even if they may not really from jaemin, he still doesn’t want to ruin them. 

renjun gives him a well too knowing look, before going back to his book. no one can deny the small smile that’s lingering on his lips. 

* * *

being the personal guard of a prince isn’t all fun and slaying dragons and getting to kiss the prince after killing said dragon. it’s more… mellow. especially when there hasn’t been a war in the kingdom since the current kings came to be. there is no one trying to poison jaemin and steal his crown, or to overthrow the royal family and send the whole realm into riot. 

everyone loves the jung family. no one dares to bad mouth them, but not out of fear of being beheaded, just purely out of respect and love. the jung family has brought prosperity, it has brought new opportunities to the people of qidal. and everyone, from those living in the villages surrounding the main town, to the tribes buried deep in the mountains, has a soft spot for prince jaemin. 

jeno can understand why. the prince is charming and witty, with a sense of humor that makes even old ladies chuckle. he is tall and can easily defeat even the mightiest of the fighters. his dumb brain is so _ fucking _ wicked that more often than not, jeno is left in awe by his ideas. people would go as far as saying that jaemin’s smile can even cure diseases. 

but to him neither of those things matter. what makes jeno fall deeper and deeper with the person he can’t have is being able to see him in ways that the public can’t. he sees jaemin with a tragic case of bedhead, drool still wet around his mouth as he rubs the sleep from his eyes with an adorable pout on his lips. he sees jaemin laughing evilly when yangyang falls for one of his pranks, before running as fast as he can from the wrath that is one certain boy covered in jelly. he sees jaemin looking starstruck while staring at the moon during their night walks, the prince’s mind far away. and sometimes, if he’s lucky, he sees jaemin dancing, all of his being poured into rehearsed moves that catch his eyes and make his heart stop. 

“you’re staring at the prince again,” johnny’s hushed voice brings him back. he’s not watching jaemin dance in the pale light, he will be watching him dance, but with a princess; his arm having a secure grip on her waist. jeno hates balls more than anything. 

“i wasn’t, sir. i was making sure that the girl isn’t an assassin or something. i’m simply doing my job,” jeno huffs, turning his eyes from jaemin to glare at johnny. 

“yeah, ok,” johnny snorts. “princess yerim is already to be wed, you know?” jeno still frowns at the now laughing couple. “and i’ve heard that countess sooyoung is quite territorial too, so maybe you can bond with her over this.”

“i’m not scared of punching you, johnny,” he threatens. 

“you’re as scary as markie, but because i am technically your dad too, i will pretend to be scared to build your confidence.” johnny waits for a moment, just enough to have jeno punch his arm weakly. he falls back, as dramatic as possible, not caring that he is working as someone that should be reserved and serious looking. 

“i hope ten makes you sleep on a chair,” jeno grumbles and turns his back at the still laughing man. 

“and i hope you’ll get to dance with the prince.” 

jeno is ready to punch him again, but johnny is already gone by the time he strikes, heading to king jaehyun with a subtle skip in his step. he fixes the couple dancing a stare again, frowning at the way princess yerim’s hands grasp at jaemin’s arms. he knows he has no reason to be jealous, especially when the prince is trying to pursue someone else, but he can’t ignore the feelings bubbling inside of him. not when they’re threatening to spill over and make a mess in his heart. 

maybe it is time to confess and get his heart smashed into millions of pieces. it might be for the best, in the end. 

* * *

he starts finding more and more things anywhere he goes. things that seem to have been placed there long before his arrival. a piece of kun’s infamous carrot cake at his table in the guards’ room, a new button for his uniform (since the little beast donghyuck tear it off when they fought last time), there is even a sword waiting for him once, its scabbard decorated with the colors of the royal house, teal and pink. 

jeno has no idea who keeps leaving such things for him. he can’t even find a reason for someone to go through all the trouble of asking kun for an extra slice! 

he acts as if they’re not there, but as soon as he is alone, he takes them, being extra careful with them, and stores them in a box under his bed. except for the cake. he stored that one in his belly. 

* * *

a piece of paper. that’s what he finds on top of his pillow one morning after his night shift. he’s so tired from staying up twelve hours straight that he doesn’t even notice it at first. it’s only when he hears the sound of paper being crumpled that he realizes its existence. 

jeno picks it up, trying to distinguish the words written neatly on it through hazy eyes. 

_ the thought of leaving you behind _

_ scares me more _

_ than leaving my own soul to rot. _

_ why is it like that, my darling? _

_ explain to me why the life of a mere boy _

_ is ought to either bring me despair, _

_ or hope. _

_ i've lived in solitude until you came. _

_ you brought a spark into my life, _

_ you are the sun that brings me warmth on gloomy days. _

_ explain to me why i fell in love with you. _

_ we're part of different worlds, yet my heart aches for you _

_ my skin craves your touch. _

_ we are two simple dots in this boundless universe, _

_ yet we are connected _

_ through fate, _

_ through love, _

_ through our own beings. _

_ explain to me why the universe did this, _

_ and maybe i'll let you go. _

_ until then, my love, accept me into your own quivering heart, _

_ and let me explain to you _

_ why i love you. _

he shoots awake as soon as he’s done, all traces of sleep leaving his body. his mind is racing, thoughts flying everywhere. this is _ jaemin’s _ handwriting, he would recognize it in a beat. but _ why _is there a love poem that he doesn’t even remember helping the prince write on his bed? 

“are you going to go to him or do i have to drag you there myself,” renjun asks, voice muffled by the pillow on his face. 

“i--”

“jeno i swear to god, if you don’t move this instant i will end your bloodline.”

reluctantly, jeno stands up, not yet sure if he should believe the threat or not. when he sees renjun take the pillow off and glare at him, he rushes out the door, his tired brain catching up with the situation he’s in just now. 

he’s running to jaemin’s room at not even seven in the morning. the prince is most likely still asleep, since he is quite a fan of sleeping in. it would be wiser to head back, maybe try to squeeze in a few hours of sleep before facing jaemin. he isn’t quite ready yet to find out the truth. 

the door next to him opens, one sleepy prince looking at him. “it took you a long time to realize, you know?” he asks, hiding a yawn with his hand. 

jeno stays frozen in place, not having enough courage to even turn to jaemin. maybe if he plays dumb, the younger will not catch onto things. “realize what, haha?”

“if you play dumb it won’t help, nono,” jaemin sighs, grabbing onto jeno’s wrist and pulling him inside his room just a tad too forcefully. “didn’t you realize that i’ve been trying to court you for the past two months now?” 

jeno’s face goes red. he must’ve misheard him. it’s the lack of sleep that’s messing with his head. there is no way that jaemin could like _ him _ , let alone fool him in such a way to get _ jeno _ to help him confess to… _ jeno _. 

jaemin sighs one more time, this one sounding even _ more _exasperated than the other one. “are you that dense, jeno?”

“but… you can’t like me, jaemin. it doesn’t make any sense… you’re a prince and i am--”

“you’re my soulmate, yes. which means that you like it or not, we’re made to be.” jaemin takes a seat on the bed, patting the spot next to him and urging jeno to sit as well. 

“how do you… know we’re soulmates?” jeno is too scared to find out the truth. he doesn’t want the world to think lowly of jaemin. he is not a freak like him. 

he links their pinkies, the red thread almost nonexistent. jeno can only see the bow on his finger and the one on jaemin’s. “because of this little red guy. and no, i don’t like you just because of a stupid thread thing. i like you because you’re _ you _. you read that poem, right? i meant every single word i put on that piece of paper, jeno. papa didn’t even help me once with it!” jaemin sounds so proud, so happy to have created such a masterpiece for jeno. 

“you mean it?” jeno asks, voice quivering with all the emotions he’s feeling. 

“would i ever lie to you, jeno?”

after a moment of silence, the elder says, “you said i looked good when hyuckie shaved my head.”

jaemin’s fingers intertwine with jeno’s, pulling on it slightly to grab his attention. “you did look good, nono. i would _ never _ lie to you.”

his face is so hot that it feels like having a fever. maybe it’s a fever dream. maybe he’s imagining how jaemin’s face is getting closer to his, his eyes falling shut with each second,closing the distance. it’s all in his head when jaemin is kissing him. 

his own eyes shut, simply letting himself enjoy this. if it’s a dream, then jeno doesn’t want to ever wake up from it. he wants to be stuck in this fantasy where jaemin loves him back forever. 

cold fingers touch his cheeks. it feels so real. he can almost pretend it’s true. 

“i love you,” jaemin whispers. “please say it back, nono.”

“you’re actually real? you actually mean it?” jeno’s voice breaks as he speaks.

the prince pushes him down on the bed. he gets in next to him and maneuvers jeno until he’s laying with his head on jaemin’s chest. “i am, and i do. but you’ve been up for twelve hours at least so maybe we should actually hold this conversation later, nono.”

suddenly tired again, jeno tries to look at jaemin again, only to have his eyes closing. he manages to let out a _ promise? _ despite the sleep invading his mind again. he barely registers jaemin linking their pinkies and whispering back the exact same word. 

* * *

jeno wakes up approximately two hours later, even more tired than when he went to sleep. he notices the hard surface his head is resting on, and after freaking out for one whole minute, he remembers that it’s just jaemin. then he proceeds to freak out again, just worse. 

“good morning,” jaemin says, voice still rough from his sleep. it sends a shiver down jeno’s spine. he can only imagine what that voice would sound like in a different situation. 

“‘morning,” jeno responds. he has to cough a couple of times to get his voice to sound normal again and not as high pitched as it just did. 

“wanna talk first or eat breakfast?”

“talk.” jaemin nods and gestures him to continue. “erm… you said you can see the thread?” he nods again. “and that would mean… you knew long before i became your guard.”

“mm-hm.”

“and you… like me?”

“jeno, i literally wrote you a love poem in which i confessed my feelings and i’m pretty sure i said i’m in love with you there. and let’s not forget i gave you my second kiss as well,” the prince laughs, his fingers threading through jeno’s hair lightly. 

jeno feels like the biggest moron to ever exist. he feels like donghyuck when he spilled his soup on mark and then proceeded to put the blame on chenle, who _ wasn’t _even in the room. it’s exactly that, but somehow a hundred times worse!

the words seem to finally register with jeno’s brain. “what do you mean your second kiss?!” he questions, sounding just more upset than how he feels. 

“well…” jaemin coughs nervously, “you know mark…”

“you kissed johnny’s brother? dude! donghyuck is gonna skin you alive now!” 

“oh? you mean his boyfriend? feisty guy, likes to annoy kun and taeil, really good at stabbing people?” jaemin says it so casually, referring to donghyuck as mark’s boyfriend as if it’s common knowledge. 

jeno is sure that by the time he leaves the prince’s chamber he will know every little secret there is to know about the residents of the castle. “boyfriend?”

jaemin hums. “i caught them being handsy in mark’s office. mark’s books were even thrown on the floor!” he explains everything, laughing when jeno turns to glare at him. he knows it’s not meant for him, but for the two idiots he’s talking about.

“i will actually kill hyuck, mark my words, jaemin,” jeno says through gritted teeth. 

“i’m sure you will, nono, but how about you kiss me first, hm? does that sound good? of course you don’t have to do it unless you really want to!”

jeno shuts him up with a gentle peck. it’s nothing more than a chaste kiss, barely long enough to feel the perfect outline of jaemin’s lips, but it’s enough to reduce the younger to a blushing, yet quiet, mess. 

“i want to do more than just kiss you, your highness,” he mockingly bows, “like maybe finally defeat you in a sword fight?”

jaemin snorts, laughing so loud that it shakes jeno. the knight watches him, the smile he’s wearing only widening with each second that passes of jaemin struggling to breath. _ he’s gorgeous, jaemin is truly a masterpiece, _ jeno thinks. his boisterous laughter brings pure joy to him. he wants to make jaemin laugh for the rest of his life. he wants to ensure that jaemin’s life is never cruel to him. 

“you’re staring again,” jaemin breaths out, still giggling every so often. 

“you’re pretty when you’re happy,” he says, all filters gone. it may sound cliche, but it’s what he thinks. he thinks of jaemin as an angel, an angel who’s accompanied by choirs whenever he speaks. 

trying to hide his blush, jaemin hits the elder lightly. “shut up, nono,” he mumbles.

“make me,” jeno shoots back, a smirk tugging at his lips. 

jaemin stares him in the eyes, his gaze flickering to his lips for half a second. he huffs, his head hitting the pillow again. “i’ll just die and let you talk as much as you want.” he lifts his arm up, pretending to grab something. “is that you mr. mcsnuffles? i haven’t seen you in years… i’m coming soon… i’m coming…” his body goes limp, jaemin goes as far as sticking his tongue out. 

“well… guess you’ll never get to kiss me again,” jeno sighs, trying to stand up. 

“i’m alive!” the prince shouts, his hold of jeno’s body tightening. “and the prince demands all the kisses you have to offer,” he says with a pout.

“the prince is rather greedy in the morning, hm?” he whispers, closing the distance between them slowly. “but i have to do what he asks of me, right?”

“you talk too much,” jaemin says and then he’s kissing him again. it’s different than the ones they’ve shared before; more heated, as if they could lose each grasp of each other if they pulled away. it’s all teeth clashing, spit running down their chins, grunts escaping them with each harsh pull on the other’s lips. 

there is no more gentleness, only desire waiting to be fulfilled. jaemin’s hand wander down, teasingly touching jeno’s sides. they move lower and lower, coming to a sudden halt once they reach his ass. he squeezes down on the cheeks, moaning in the elder’s mouth when his hips snap forward, their crotches brushing. 

there are too many clothes between them, too many layers separating their heated skin looking for an equally heated hand to help them. jeno wants nothing more than to touch, to enjoy the way jaemin feels underneath his calloused hands.

“can i…” his words trail off, unsure of how to speak his request. he silently pulls at jaemin’s sleep tunic, hoping it’s enough for the prince to understand. 

“you’re worse than how appa was around pa,” jaemin snorts, taking his shirt off and throwing it on the ground. he holds his arms out, letting jeno enjoy the smooth lines of his chest and stomach. his muscles aren’t as defined as jeno’s, but they are far more beautiful. there is nothing he wants more than to bite down on the flawless skin and _ mark _ jaemin. “happy, darling?”

jeno nods, but before he can resume his actions of kissing the prince, said boy stops him, a finger poking his chest. “uniform _ off _ or else you’re out of here with a hard prick,” he says. jaemin sounds nothing more than serious, so the elder throws his own shirt off, not caring that he may ruin it. he moves to pull the pants down, but he is stopped once again by the prince. 

“allow me, pretty,” jaemin whispers, his deft fingers quick to pull at the buttons and strings that keep him away from touching the elder. it joins their shirts on the floor soon enough, and so, jeno is left bare for jaemin’s eyes only. 

jaemin straddles his middle, enjoying far too much the way jeno squirms under him. he’s wearing such an evil smile, that the elder is scared to even try and phantom what goes on inside his head. his fingers pull on one of jeno’s nipples, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. the pleasure that shoots up jeno’s spine makes him turn red at just how shameless he is. 

“you’re so responsive, darling. who would’ve thought that you’d crumble with just one touch, hm?” the prince hums as he moves on to the other brown bud, giving it the exact same treatment, if not even harsher. 

jeno can’t seem to be able to form a coherent response, only whining when jaemin pushes his ass down on his crotch, rather forcefully. it’s embarrassing, how just something as simple as one heated touch can make him go limp on the soft bed. 

they don’t do anything else besides grinding on each other, too scared of hurting their soulmate, yet too aroused to stop their ministration. despite the haziness covering his mind, jeno can still see the string dancing around them, shortening and growing with each push, each pull. it’s truly hypnotizing, how it follows jaemin, the way it urges him to never leave the younger’s side. 

jaemin’s still covered ass brings him exactly the amount of friction he needs, and he wants nothing but to feel the curve of his cheeks on his aching cock, to feel it disappear inside of jaemin. _ another time_, he muses. 

leaning in again, jaemin kisses him, reveling in the sweet mewls that escape the elder. if somehow possible, he presses down harder. jeno almost loses himself, lifting his hips up to meet jaemin. “that’s right, sweetheart,” he says against jeno’s lips, “do as you please.”

and with the permission jaemin has just given him, jeno lets himself lose the last bit of self control within him. his hips move on their own accord, snapping forward roughly, pushing his dick in between jaemin’s asscheeks. it riles the soft material of the prince’s sleeping shorts up, until jeno can _ feel _, catch a simple glimpse at the sensation of jaemin’s skin on his cock. 

_ it’s heaven. pure bliss_. 

jeno wants more, to bite off more than he can chew, to have the prince give him everything and take back just as much. he wishes to be at the younger’s mercy, to be at the end of his whip and fingers, to receive his sweet, gentle caress at the end of it all.

he cums, spilling his seed over jaemin’s shorts and his lower back. he goes limp, motionless under jaemin. jeno is _ spent _, but even so he notices the tent that is still inside jaemin’s shorts. he acts without much thought, his hand reaching for it, wrapping around the covered cock in a loose hold. 

jeno moves his hand fast, not wanting to keep jaemin away from his orgasm any longer. his eyes half lidded look up at the younger, meeting his gaze. jeno gives him a tired smile, and says, “cum for me, daddy.”

and jaemin does, dirtying his pants, the cum seeping through the material and staining jeno’s hand as well. 

jeno stares at him, dumbfounded. “i can’t believe you liked… you want me to call you daddy…”

the younger hits his chest weakly, a whine coming from deep inside his chest. “shut _ up_, i was just really close!” he blushes brightly; the pretty red across his face and neck makes something stir inside jeno’s chest. 

“sure you were, nana,” he says, pulling jaemin down to lay on top of him. neither cares that they’re both covered in cum and uncomfortably wet clothes. 

jaemin gasps, but jeno doesn’t let him stand and look at him. “you called me _ nana!_ without me having to threaten you!”

the knight shushes him, his hand resting on jaemin’s head, petting it gently. “and what if i did?”

“you’re getting soft!” 

“mhm,” jeno hums, enjoying the way the red thread moves around their bodies. the dance it performs is mesmerizing, but nothing could enchant him more than the way jaemin moves, breathes, exists. 

“you know,” jaemin starts, voice drifting more and more as he falls asleep slowly, “the gods gave me two hands for a reason.”

jeno’s hand stills. “what?” the younger, however, doesn’t answer. he’s already asleep, his breathing evened out, the rise and fall of his back making jeno sigh. 

whatever it means, he’s sure jaemin will tell him sooner or later. for now, he only has to focus on the sleeping prince resting on his chest. on him and their soon to be future together. he can’t wait for the world to know of his love for jaemin, but there is still undoubtable fear of them finding out they knew they are meant to be. 

jeno doesn’t want people to stop loving jaemin, just like how he wants jaemin to never stop loving his people. he can’t be the cause of the fall of jung jaemin. he doesn’t want jaemin to have _ only _him. he can’t even explain to himself how he wants jaemin to be loved, just in case one day his love alone will not be enough for him, in case he may not be able to come back to him and love him anymore. 

a slack squeeze of his finger, of his _ pinkie _ pulls him back of the dark ocean he’s been falling into. 

jeno hugs jaemin tighter, and finally falls back asleep, soothed into the realm of dreams by jaemin’s soft murmur. for now, he has to love jaemin and be there for him. for now, they are together and in love. for now, everything seems to have fitted into a perfect puzzle. no piece missing, nothing desired to be added. 

just before meeting jaemin in his dream, renjun’s face flashes before his eyes. he tries to ignore it, and in his dream, jeno runs towards the younger. 

**Author's Note:**

> let me know how many times u wanted to punch jeno 😔  
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